The first stage of maximising influence is building trust, which we do through our use of the 4 C’s. Take meeting someone for the first time. 90% of first impressions are formed in the first 90 seconds, during which they size you up through the filters of the 4C’s and ask themselves:
- Your Character – Do I trust you? Are you a person of integrity? Are you for me or for yourself?
- The Chemistry – Do I like you? Do I connect with you and enjoy spending time with you?
- Your Competency – Are you competent? Do you know what you’re talking about? Are you confident in the way you communicate your competence? Do you have a proven track record?
- Your Credibility – Is it relevant to me? Are you able to take your competence, understand the complexity of my reality and design a bespoke solution that helps me achieve my goals?
Most of us have a tendency focus on one or two of the four C’s where we have a natural strength. This can inadvertently show up as ‘too much of a good thing’ and consequentially we skip over other areas which can undermine our influence. As a rule, roughly half of us (let’s call them ‘thinkers’) present to others displaying confidence and ease with their Competency and Credibility, where facts, structure, rationale and dealing with the ‘here and now’ take precedence. The other half (let’s call them ‘feelers’) use Character and Chemistry to present as trustworthy and likeable, where relational harmony, people, and values are their lens of the world view.
Once you have built self-awareness of your 4 C’s tendencies and are working toward balance, there remains the danger being merely transactional – taking short-term gains and leaving long term relational impact on the floor. Taking the next step requires breaking down our walls of self-preservation to expand our relationships and uncover the true value and real impact of authentic influence. If you find yourself slipping into transactional interactions, ask yourself the following questions:
- What am I afraid of losing?
- What am I trying to hide?
- What am I trying to prove? To whom?
Some of the typical areas of self-preservation will come as no surprise:
Vulnerability: Am I prepared to be that vulnerable?
Rejection: What if they don’t want relationship with me?
Priority: I have immediate financial targets to hit.
Value: Do relationships have any place in the business world?
Time: I’d love to, but I don’t have the time.
Capacity: I don’t need more relationships.
I hope this model of authentic influence helps you become a secure, confident, and humble leader. The world needs more of these.